There was a beginning. The day photography took over. What exactly it took over is and will forever be unknown. It’s not like how you have read about it, the cliches that make statements like: from the moment I picked up a camera I knew this was what I wanted to do. Or, from a young age I knew I wanted to be a photographer. There are others, I have read them, they are boring but I read them anyway.

I am an introvert, I make no excuses for that in fact I am proud of that personality trait that seems to run in my family. I had no idea how well such a trait would not only empower me as a photographer but grow into one of the biggest attributes I could have.

I too am curious of others and can even find some bio’s interesting. I greatly respect those who have the skill to convey such personal insights into something like a public bio. I have never felt like I could do that with the depth of emotion I so strongly feel. The vast majority are slightly differing pieces of the same pie. I like pie as well but I always chose the one that others seem to be leary about.

Those last three short paragraphs have way too many I’s in them. And so do most reasons for being a photographer. I want, I feel, I am, I need, and the I’s can be endless. This endeavor into the creative photographic world of (in my case) nature photography came late in life. Most good or great things have taken place late in life say within the last 10 years. My kids are all older than that so they take exception to this but in many ways this 10 year window can still apply with them.

If I seem to be rambling somewhat keep in mind I am, and I am aware of that. Thoughts seem to spill like a kids milk at the dinner table, unexpectedly and without warning. I miss those milk spilling days. Not necessarily due to nostalgia but more due to the unexpectedness of it, the what next it presented.

You may be wondering what does this have to do with photography, my photography. The answer is everything. Every moment, every event, every day that has led up to this point has had an effect. It is not because I discovered photography at a young age or knew this was what I wanted to do from childhood. It is and has been about living. How life has presented itself and how the paths that have been chosen have lead to this point.

When we make choices many times possibly most times we look back and think, what if I had done this, or that. We all do this it is after all human nature. There should be no predetermined wrong choices only choices we can and should learn from. I consider my choices over the last 10-15 years to have been filled with what ifs and I am fine with that. I also consider my last 8 years of making photography a driving force in my life to be just the beginning. I am constantly wondering what if when I make a decision to pursue a particular path or creative endeavor. I know without doubt most have been learning experiences and not grand successes. I also expect this to never end.

There was a beginning but I am not sure there will ever be a middle or end. That is what keeps the desire and drive alive and well. To never be complacent or satisfied. To always strive to do better, to be better.

Yes there was a beginning and thank goodness it still is.

 

Blue Disposition

©Brad Mangas

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